u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
