obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Cover your peen. We're going out.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
