OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
There something liberating about walking through the dorm hallways without pants on.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
