I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
