Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
Randomize
