no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Randomize
