Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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