It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
i drank out of a bidet.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You know you have a problem when your man yells at you that his penis is not your personal play toy.
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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