I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Randomize
