i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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