On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
