My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
Just saw a half naked, drunk, 6th grade math teacher throwing small children around to the Titanic soundtrack.
What kind of wedding is this and why wasn't I invited
she both took care of me and took advantage of me. it was BEAUTIFUL.
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Randomize
