WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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