You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
