I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I think the only context in which I'd be comfortable being kidnapped is by a band of baby sloths
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
I passed up getting laid last night. It's almost been a YEAR - what the Hell was I thinking, being so choosy??
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