oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
