quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
I really need to get a comfy set of masturbating shoes
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
