whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
