everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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