Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
So gin and wine won't be happening again
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I just woke and had to fish my phone out of a bowl of chili. I was wrist deep in it. WHO BROUGHT CHILI TO A PARTY?!
its not chili. and you brought it.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
Randomize