Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
all I remember is them saying he had a big dick and the next thing I know I’m leaving with him
Randomize
