Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
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