too bad you live with your parents still
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
operation harelip BJ is a go
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
oh my god i'm in a crawl space
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
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