I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Acid is not a monday night drug
all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
Randomize
