I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
