It really wasn't that bad. Well, it was pretty bad, but only in 3 second bursts.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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