is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize
