Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Even my vagina gasped.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
he was spending his time trying to use emojis to court a 19 year old, I can’t really take that seriously no matter how hot a dude is
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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