yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
I had a pretty decent weekend -- aside from dropping the baby on her head. That.. That I feel bad about.
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Randomize
