Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Randomize
