wake up i wanna do it froggy style
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
Randomize
