If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I still have a little drunk in my system
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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