white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
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