We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
i out mim tonsoeep
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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