Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
