4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
