Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
