As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
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