he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
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