More tranny stories later!
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
So you're not gonna be in town tonight?! Your dick was the light at the end of my academic tunnel!
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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