he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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