It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
