My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
When you sleep in the bathroom, you're no longer a guest.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
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