you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
I'm listening to Michael Jackson while drinking vodka, alone. Honestly, l wish I could Moonwalk my way back to when I knew wtf was going on in my life.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
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