You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
