He wanted to take me out and said we could "go huntin in the woods."
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Happy Birthday. May your liver respect you, fat bitches neglect you, hangovers reject you, and AA accept you.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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