I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
I realized last night, I never talk dirty in German during sex. How much wasted potential is that?
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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