I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
I fucking, woke up on a couch with a towel as a blanket to someones lion king ringtone.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
You need Xanax blowdarts
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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