And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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