And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
