Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Randomize
