Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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