so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Randomize
