no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
